FreeStyle

You get your hopes up
only to be let down again..
You depend on her
only to find out,
it was just another lie..
now you just sit there and cry..
and basically say FUCK life..
It's not over
give it another try...
this time why not try God..
you can depend on him to
get you through a tuff time
It's not over sister
Please don't cry..
I been there before and I have cried
night after night..
Until I realized it was not my fight
I gave it to the Lord and you should too..


This is a freestyle

To my sis

A Depressed Mess!!!!

I need someone to rid my mind of
these negative thoughts. I keep getting caught.
Thoughts of suicide surround my head.
like a dead creature, covered with flies.
These thoughts are eating me alive,
feel like I'm gonna have a meltdown.
Lord I desperately need a sign.
I wanna run and cry, because my mind
is going a mile a minute.
I can't think and I can't blink.
My thoughts are weak and my tears leak.
like a never ending creek.
I'm drowning in negativity, I can't reach my happy place
It has gone to outer space, and I become a disgrace
to my own face. I can't keep up with the pace, because
my thoughts have been laced with suicide and
I don't even like that side,
now I lack pride and I struggle to survive
Lord this is my cry
as you can see I tried..

Untitled

I made it another year,
I have shed so many tears,
and gotten over a lot of fears
and by the grace of God, I am still here
(In my Monica Voice)
I'm still standing
I've gone through a lot in my life.
Pain and Strife.
But I put up a good fight
I stood on solid ground
and held my own.
Even though I almost gave up.
God was there to pick me up
and that is why
I walk with my head up!

This is Unfinished.

UnFinished

I spent 8yrs in the Foster Care System,
8yrs belonging to the state of michigan
In the care of 7 different strangers,
5 different social workers, 4 different
therapist, to many diagnois to count. A lot of medications
I wonder if they thought I was crazy?
It was hard, felt like I barely got an education.
My life I hated-- I just couldn't take it.
I got tired of faking it.
8yrs of people walking in and out of my life.
I didn't think I would make it.
Holding my tears back, just so I could stay strong
Everything in my life felt wrong.
I had forgotten the words to my favorite song.
All because my pain had lasted to long.
I just didn't want to belong
But I was young and didn't understand what was going on.

This poem is Unfinished
I aged out of Foster Care
March,24th 2011